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Post by Jude on Dec 16, 2009 22:02:32 GMT -5
For when you just posted in the Random Thoughts thread and you want to do it again but you don't want to double post or do another one after the 60 you just made. Or if you just wanna post here that's groovy too XD
LOL "If you think your child is trying drugs, we can help." I wish somebody would help me try drugs. I need to know where I can get some good acid. If drugfree.org is a site, is freedrugs.org a site? I'ma check.
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Post by Jude on Dec 16, 2009 22:21:22 GMT -5
I can't without the mouse. Check if the site is real I mean. I think I'ma torture myself and listen to "Sleepwalker." Let's see how long it takes me to cry... GOD IT'S SO SAD!! It's like totally hopeless. It breaks my heart. He said "You're everything that I want, but you don't want me." But it's even worse for him than it was for me in highschool because this character actually HAD the one he loves and then lost him. And there's nothing he can do. "I can't turn this around... I keep running into walls and I can't break down... " The worst is when he says "It's like I can't even feel, after the way you touched me." I don't know why. I can't stand it. I have no idea why I'm listening to it... I suppose it's beautiful. I think the reason "Whataya Want From Me" affects me so much is cause I really relate to some of the stuff he says. I just realized... I have such a strong connection with so many of the songs on here. When he says "Yeah... I'm afraid" it really gets me. I mean... I AM. I think part of the reason I'm so into him is because it's time for me to learn from him. Good timing, too. Birthday and Christmas XD When he says "Baby you're beautiful, and there's nothing wrong with you. It's me; I'm a freak. But thanks for loving me, cause you're doing it perfectly..." so cute <3 God I love him. And when he says "I'm working it out" ... yeah. I'm working it out. I hope nobody ever hurt him like that... Why do people hurt each other? I heard something today about a little kid who they found a whole bunch of needles inside of. Like in his body. In his organs and stuff. WHY? But really... sitting around worrying about why people hurt each other doesn't do any good. I'ma listen to "If I Had You." I like in that song when he says "All we need in this world is some love." He's right. That's another reason I like him. He's positive and he's right. I mean sure some of his stuff is sad, but he seems like a really positive guy. Like listening to him talk. And his eyes are so ... alive. That's it. He's alive. He's full of joy and drive and excitement. I adore him. Can you tell? "What they need in this world is some love..." When I first started listening to this album in the actual CD not just a burned disc of downloads... it was like whoa. Very clear and shit. I love it XD I dreamed about him. Is that weird? I really wanted him. And I wanted him to like me. I wish the mouse moved... I want to go on facebook... He said "Are you gonna play with me?" Um...
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Post by Barn Owl on Dec 17, 2009 14:57:47 GMT -5
Jeeez Jude you always have so much meaningful stuff to say... it's nice to read.
And this is a good thread xD
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Post by Jude on Dec 18, 2009 20:39:25 GMT -5
thank you ^^
yay i'm glad you like it. it's superfluous *grin*
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Post by PurpleGrape on Dec 28, 2009 0:09:51 GMT -5
I have trouble listening to Sleepwalker and Whataya Want From Me cause they're both SO emotional and they kinda pretty much rip me in half. But I keep listening to them anyway.
It hurts....but I think I love it. I love being able to feel something even if it's negative. I like knowing I'm not completely heartless.
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Post by Jude on Dec 31, 2009 11:39:51 GMT -5
Exactly man! They're so... much. And they're really beautiful, even though they're sad. Lots of sad stuff is beautiful. I think every emotion has an important place in life. And "Whataya Want From Me" isn't something I'd really consider to be negative... I mean it's powerful and sad but it's also hopeful, y'know?
I'm hungry. I'm trying to decide if eating leftover microwave popcorn is what I would call a good idea. What I really want is tacos and vegan lasagna. I've never made vegan lasagna and I don't know if I even can but I bet I can : D And vegan tacos are absurdly good. Weird that I should be craving this stuff in what is technically my breakfast hour XD
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Post by PurpleGrape on Jan 3, 2010 19:44:36 GMT -5
You're right. it's sad but hopeful....a little neagative thrown into the positive. Like life in general I think.
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Post by Jude on Jan 4, 2010 14:17:34 GMT -5
Yeah. We wouldn't know what positive was if it weren't for negative. I have a hard time considering anything to be really negative, though, cause I think everything has its place.
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Post by Jude on Jan 8, 2010 10:13:24 GMT -5
I want to turn my room into the physical version of this forum. I WANT TO! and i want to invite people into it. i want to cover the floors and the walls with colour. like, with squishy blankets and beanbag chairs and posters and lava lamps and a black light and art supplies that anybody can grab and use and a FRUIT BASKET CAUSE I'VE WANTED ONE SINCE I WAS LIKE SIX and it occurred to me that i can paint things. if i get some paint i can paint my trashcan and my drawers and stuff. there also would be lots of incense and smoking would be allowed but prolly not shoes for the safety of the floor. i'm thinking... i could make lots of teeny tiny rugs. i got the idea cause of that carpet that comes in tiles. i could carpet the floor in wild coloured tiles. that way if anything happened to one i could pull it up and clean it. and there would be music obviously. it would be brilliant. and i want to cover the window in that fabric i saw in the store... i was black with rainbow peace signs. it's hippie AND gay. who could ask for anything more...? so when i'm less broke i wanna start doing that. yeah. i really need to go to work but i dun wanna. baw. i will never be less broke if i don't get over my ridiculous aversion to work lool.
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Post by Jude on Jan 30, 2010 12:12:59 GMT -5
I've been thinking... all the food that I want to have but isn't vegan or is expensive... I could just make it myself. Like vegetable pot pies. I could make a really big one and it could last for days. And I could make sandwiches and wrap them up individually or put them in a box. I need a plastic storage box for food. See, the thing is, I get bursts of energy, and I have times when I don't want to cook. So if I use the burst of energy to make food for the next time too, then I won't get hungry when I don't have any energy. I want to make granola bars. And sandwiches. And bread, before sandwiches. I bet I could make cinnamon raisin bread : D There's all KINDS of stuff I could do. I also want some grapes. If I take grapes off the viney bits and wash them I'm more likely to eat them before they go bad. There are so many things I could do to make eating easier, and now that I have an income I can go buy the food myself without having to think about remembering the food card or how much is left on it or whether anyone else will like what I'm buying or any of that. Of course, I'd make stuff other people like too : D I wanna try to make vegan lasagna. There are so many opportunities! I love food <3
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Post by PurpleGrape on Mar 1, 2010 20:43:00 GMT -5
Jude....your avatar is fucking sexy! XD
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Post by Jude on Mar 2, 2010 13:02:45 GMT -5
why thank you : D
brawr. i am all kinds of irritable today. i don't know what's wrong with me. i'm still sick, that much i do know. there's something majorly fucked up about my ears. this computer is driving me crazy with its silly inability to do anything. i have no motivation. i can't even bring myself to feed! i'm sick and i'm not taking care of myself. i'm preoccupied with things that are making me crazy. i'm listening to cypress hill because it's all that makes me feel better, even though it's sort of making my head hurt. i don't even want willow on me! she's all purry and happy and i'm just like 'dude, can you go somewhere else?' wtf? that's not like me o.o nothing seems worth the effort. i kind of want a bath... but it's not worth the effort. i'm kind of starving to death but i don't have the motivation to toast a fucking bagel! this is completely ridiculous. also, i didn't get enough sleep last night so i'm gonna be all fucked up and pissed off when i go to work. nothing is working! i feel so disconnected from myself. i don't feel quite as bad if there are other people awake, but there aren't. there's something majorly wrong if i can't stand being with myself. i STILL have a fucking cough. it's been quite over a week. i feel unbalanced. i tried sleeping more so i didn't have to deal with it but i can't. i hate feeling like this, cause it feels wrong. i just want to be right again. i want to depend on myself. when i get stuck on something that involves someone else i get depressed. i want to clean things up and do things for myself and not feel like shit. i have absolutely no good reason to be depressed. ah fuck it. i'm just gonna go get in the bath.
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Post by Barn Owl on Mar 2, 2010 21:01:13 GMT -5
Aww, I hate feeling depressed and then thinking that there's no reason for me to be, it just makes everything even more depressing  Baths are good though... you should add a ton of bubbles |
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Post by Jude on Mar 3, 2010 12:43:23 GMT -5
Yeah I feel heaps better now though : D Oh dude, I need to get some bubbling stuff. I used to have this awesome patchouli/orange bath foam stuff that was SO cool, but it's gone now. I bet I can find more stuff like that online : ) |
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